A classic Ricky Bobby quote, to be sure. But beyond its contextual hilarity, this quote immediately came to mind when I decided to write this blog entry. I'm hoping to start writing more often, but I've said that before so we shall see. Now, on with it.
I've been wanting to write this for a while, and a few days ago I experienced the last straw in putting it off. I took a trip to a nearby mall with an Apple store to get a new iPod. My old model broke sometime in the April-May area of this year and I found out that Apple gives you a 10% discount on a new one if you recycle any old model, so that's what I did. When I took my old 20-gig iPod photo from my pocket to give to the cashier, his immediate reaction was, "Oh, nice!" We had a brief conversation about how he likes seeing when people see the older models of products that people still use, since new versions seem to come out so often. I had a good run with my old iPod. I got it in the summer of 2005, just before I started college, and it lasted me all four years I was in Athens and nearly another year. After mentioning how the old pod had lasted me through college, I got a little sentimental(don't worry, I was able to hold back the tears), because it was a unique metaphor for where I am in my life.
During my time at Ohio University a lot changed in my life, as it does for everyone in their late teens/early 20s, and I went through a very wide range of experiences and learned a lot about the world, the people in it, and myself. I worked on a show that won a regional Emmy, had a relationship with someone that lasted nearly two years(by far the most serious one of my life), confirmed that I had chosen the right field I wanted to work in, and made some of the best friends I have ever and will ever have. Through all the highs and lows, all the stressful and fun times, one thing I always had was that iPod. Sure, there were probably some other constants during my college career, but in four years I probably used it more often then anything. I had it while walking to classes and uptown, in the WOUB newsroom while getting ready for a show, when I went for runs along the Hocking, and hooked up to the speakers at 124 East Union.
Even though now I'm more than a year removed from college life, thinking about how much that iPod and I went through in Athens reminded me of how much I miss it. While I hated going to class with a passion, it was still one of the best times of my life and Athens will always have a special place in my heart, as anyone who went there can understand. The year following graduation was a very strange one. I essentially spent the year failing at getting a job. I probably sent resumes and demo reels to 50+ job openings and had a total of 4 interviews. Part of that may have been due to the state of the economy and the fact that people who had been out of college for a year or two were applying for the same jobs I was. At the same time, though, a lot of my classmates got jobs in the broadcast industry, so I'm not sure what the specific reason or reasons for my lack of success was/were...don't think I ever will.
Lucky for me, I have parents who were willing to help me out and put me up while I looked for real work. Meanwhile I started working at the ice rink where I learned to skate and spent 3+ days a week throughout high school. It didn't pay much and isn't what I wanted to do for an extended period of time, but it was the perfect part-time job for me while I tried to start my career. Sure it was less than awesome when people I knew from high school came in and saw me working there, but it wasn't that big of a deal. And, even when I went through some cases of "this is what I'm doing as a college graduate?", the people I worked with helped me through it. They were easily the best part of the job and I'm incredibly grateful that I got to meet and work with them.
After spending a year in career limbo I finally got a real job and moved on to the next stage of life. As most of the people reading this know, I started working for ESPN this past June as a production assistant. It has already been a great experience for me and I'm learning a lot about the industry and how things work here, and the people are work with are amazing. If you're reading this you probably also know that it can take a while for me to open up to people and build strong relationships. Not that I'm a loner...I feel like I'm pretty nice and easy to get along with, but it's just who I am. Thankfully everyone here in Bristol has been incredibly welcoming and nice to me.
Not only has my life taken some huge turns in the last few months, but the same can be said for the people I love. Two days before I started my job, my sister got married. I can say, without a doubt, that that day was the happiest I had ever been for anyone. Ever. I don't know her husband all that well but I hope to change that as time goes on, even though they live in St. Louis and I'm now in Connecticut...we didn't coordinate our moving directions too well. These moves also caused a huge change for my parents. After almost a year of having both their kids living at home, in a matter of 3 days both of us were gone. I know they're glad we're out and making our own lives(just like I'm glad to no longer be living with my parents at age 23), but it's a heck of a change in a very short amount of time. I know it's a little hard on them, as it is on me.
I knew living on my own in a new place would be difficult, but there are some aspects of it that are much harder than I expected. Again, I'm definitely glad to be out on my own, not living at home, and making more that $7.50 an hour, but Ohio is all I've ever known, and I basically left everyone important to me behind when I moved to Connecticut. Obviously I love my parents and knew it would be difficult to be this far away from them, but it seems like I underestimated what it would be like to move away from my friends. It's not that I didn't think it would be difficult; like I said, I know how amazing my friends are and that I would miss them. Plus, as I was preparing to leave, a couple of my best friends were on their way to Columbus, joining the rest of the crew that was already there. It really hit home how much I miss them when activities started happening back in Ohio and I wasn't there. I spent the last year being around and available for a lot of amazing times, and now I'm not around for them. I'm glad to finally have a job in the field I want to be in, but part of me definitely misses being in Ohio. It's just another representation of the change occurring in my life. Like the iPod.
Despite how much has changed for me, I'm not at all convinced that things will settle down any time soon. For one, my job is currently a seven-month gig. Once that time is up, they evaluate the work I've done and whether or not they want to hire me full-time. While I'm confident that I'm a smart guy who knows what he's doing and works hard, there are no guarantees. I could be gone after seven months or stay for years to come. At this point, I'm willing to say anything could happen.
For all that has changed, I'm determined to not let the friendships I've made deteriorate. Sure I'm living 10+ hours away from most of them, but despite that distance my friends are still one of the best things in my life. A random text, e-mail or phone call from Ohio can sometimes be the best part of my day, and that's just fine. I'm not saying I won't make new friends here or wherever life takes me, but I never ever will lose the friends I already have.
Basically, I don't know what the future holds for me, and that might be for the best. There have been times when I get caught up in a "What am I going to do for the rest of my life" mindset, but when it comes down to it I'm 23. I'm not saying I don't have goals, career and otherwise, because I absolutely do. But goals change. Opportunities can materialize from strange places. You can meet someone you want to spend your life with when and where you least expect it(or so I'm told). That's why we play the games.
So while I've moved on to a new media player, I'll always look back on that old brick iPod fondly, as silly as it may sound. We went through a lot together.
Such is life.
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